A friend and colleague (who happens to be a dating and relationship expert) recently posted about how she manifested her soulmate in 30 days.

It got me thinking…

Anybody interested in how I manifested my soulmate in 30 YEARS??

Perhaps not.

There’s an entire industry devoted to coaching people towards the relationship of their dreams. Even in my most desperate days, I never felt attracted to that particular approach. Love remains a mystery, even when it bathes the entirety of my life.

As I (excitedly) roll towards Valentine’s Day (which offers so many of my favorites – hearts, sparkles and the color red), I share with you my view of love and hope the holiday reminds you of how lovable you are.

I mean it. Come here and give me a smooch…

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The perfectly paved path that used to define my flawless relationship with my daughter has hit a few potholes lately. Her pressing against the constraints of youth has been pushing against my own tender places as a mother and a being. The difficulties accumulate.

Consistently, however, I have these moments of transcendence. When I look at her, think of her, or experience her in some way, I am filled with a sensation for which I have no better word than Love.

It is not the love I know of ownership, desire, or craving. It is not even the love of fulfillment and satisfaction. It is an entirely other thing.

In those moments, when the experience of my inner world becomes indescribable, I wonder if this intensity of emotion belongs in the human experience. What purpose does this nearly overwhelming emotion play, other than ensuring early survival, which would require a mere fraction of what has actually transpired?

My only answer is that, for me at least, this is the gateway to LOVE. Again, not the love of songs, stories or cinema. LOVE as an inherent state of being – that which connects each of us to the other, like the molecules of breath we share.

Sometimes I can see it clearly. More often than not, it stays hidden behind the masks of this flesh-and-blood life. Always, the opportunity is there, a rare gift that transmits through and transcends the senses I am so deeply grateful for.

I have experienced great and grand love in my life and if it were all taken away from me in the next breath, I would not feel like I missed out on any of life’s great experiences. There has been an abundance of family, friend and intimate connections in my life. More than any one person could possibly deserve, I sometimes wonder.

My daughter opened a door for me that only a very few had ventured through before. I am not sure if I could have even conceived of the experience before her, despite my many decades of an open-hearted life. The intensity brings me to my knees, in prayer, surrender and the deepest gratitude.

All these flavors of love have their place in the human experience.

There’s the love of my senses: I love kale, my MacBook Air, and the new Maroon 5 song.

There’s the love of my heart: I Love my girl, my guy, and the legion of bright souls who have illuminated my time here.

There’s the love of my soul: I LOVE.

The first two represent states of doing, while the last is a state of being. The difference is subtle and vast at the same time. I don’t decry any as inferior.

When we acknowledge that LOVE is the natural state of the soul, perhaps the others (love, Love) come more easily. When we tune into the energy that creates and connects all life, everything gets better. [Important note: This doesn’t mean that we automatically like everything or everyone. That’s a whole different matter.]

LOVE lives within us and around us nonetheless.

I feel deeply thankful that I get to enjoy love that fills my senses, that fills my heart, and that forms the basis of my existence. Sometimes all at the same time. I am awed by the amount of pleasure each can bring.

Thank You.